Previous Stoicism

TRY THE OTHER HANDLE

“Every event has two handles—one by which it can be carried, and one by which it can’t. If your brother does you wrong, don’t grab it by his wronging, because this is the handle incapable of lifting it. Instead, use the other—that he is your brother, that you were raised together, and then you will have hold of the handle that carries.”

- EPICTETUS, ENCHIRIDION

Summary:
Epictetus teaches that every situation can be viewed from different angles—some helpful, others harmful. When faced with a challenge or offence, we should choose the perspective that allows us to handle it constructively, rather than one that fuels resentment or makes it harder to bear.

Interpretation:
In real life, this means that when someone upsets you, like a family member, friend, or colleague, you have a choice in how you respond. The Daily Stoic reminds us that focusing on the hurt or injustice only increases suffering. Instead, look for the more compassionate or rational “handle” to hold onto—for example, remembering shared history, their humanity, or your values. This mindset doesn’t excuse wrong behaviour but helps you maintain control over your emotions and act with wisdom rather than reaction.

 

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